Thursday, September 3, 2009


I don't know what the fuck is wrong with people. No matter how close you are to someone, you think you know them and it just all backfires.

I've been really trying to get with April. She's such an awesome girl, but she wants nothing to do with me. I've been flirting back and forth with her and I've been trying my best to juggle all sorts of friendship and make life work out, but guess what? It just isn't working! She just wants other guys and just considers me a basic friend, at best!

I'm a genuinely honest guy and I try my best to put as much effort into my friendships as possible, but I always get fucked over. In the long run, I lose all but my closest friends and walk away with nothing to show for my many journeys through life.

What is it with people? I can show my heart to it's fullest and really prove that I love any singled out family member or close friend, but they always act like I've never done a fucking thing for them. WHY? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE??

I seriously wish that I had the strength to end my own life and walk away from this fucked up world. I feel like I would be doing the world a favor. No matter how hard I try, I just can't win...

I need someone; anyone. I just need to hold and be held. I need to love and to be loved. I need to know that I am appreciated. It just...isn't happening..