Imperfection...

As I lay down in the bath tub, deep thoughts about life and the world around all of us came rushing through my head. I'm about to share brief bits of those thoughts with you, whoever you are. I wont go into very much detail because it's after 8AM, I'm tired and I need to be up, ready and at my close female cousin's baby shower by 2PM.

First, "Infinity:1". The idea that saving one person's life has the possibility of saving countless others. Who knows what could happen? An infinite number of lives could be saved or even destroyed just by letting any other being live. The choices you make to protect and destroy the lives of others could very well hold the fate of the entire universe. Sure, it sounds ridiculous and honestly, even I think it's a bit far-fetched in some respects, but if you put that into perspective, it's still a very powerful truth.

Next, let's talk about imperfections. When you love someone, is it because they're perfect? No? Well, is it because of their merits? Yes? No? How about their flaws? Be honest. Most people wont ever consider the flaws of another person as something to appreciate. However, I think that's precisely why most relationships ultimately fail. If you truly love someone, you'll learn to appreciate and even love their imperfections, as they're just as much a part of that person as their perfections. There's somebody out there for each and every one of us, but we could pass that person by simply due to a simple imperfection. A word to the wise: Give people a chance. You never know who could turn out to be Mr. or Mrs. Right or even an incredible friend!

Finally, I've made a conclusion about my Australian ex-girlfriend, once and for all. Simply put, if she really cared about me, she'd of been willing to sacrifice a few things to make it happen. I was more than willing and I had money saved up to move out there and be with her. I had documents drawn ready and waiting for her approval, as well as passport documents ready to be filed, paid for and shipped out for processing. All I had to do was get a Visa, even if only temporary for 6-12 months as a starting point and go from there, but she wasn't willing to cooperate. She insisted that she was willing and kept telling me that she'd go to her embassy to figure out which route we should go, but she just kept putting it off. In the end, I discovered that she truly doesn't care about me as she does other people. I was more or less a phase. She used me to fill a void when she had lots of problems and too much time on her hands. That's pretty much all it comes down to. As a result, however, she has an odd sort of attachment to me because we spent so much time together. She feels the need to have me in her life. She just has to be able to talk to me and she can't deal without it right now. With our first argument going on even as I write this, which is the only one since we've started talking again, she still treats me like dirt. She ignores me, hides from me and logs on for a second to see if I've sent her any messages. If she sees something she wants to respond to, she'll drop a single sentence in response and then immediately log off. It's almost always some sort of defensive statement, in which she place all of the blame on me because she can't admit it when she's wrong, ever. Anyhow, I need to cut this short so I can get some rest, so let's put it this way: I'm done with her. I wont be sending her anymore messages. If she wants to talk, she can come to me and if she does, she had better damn well be kind, respectful and civil about it.

And with that, I'm off to catch a few winks of sleep. Take care!

-SM