Hey guys. I'd like to introduce myself. My name is Steve and this is probably the most formal you'll ever see me, so try not to get too comfortable just yet.
Okay, let's cut the crap. No one really cares about a formal introduction. Surely you want to know something more interesting than my location, age or gender, right? Maybe something about my crazy sex life or something like that? Hah! Prepare to be disappointed because I'm typically a pretty boring guy when it really comes down to it!
You see, most of my days are spent alone in a small room of a row home in Baltimore, Maryland. Lately, I spend most of my time talking with people, browsing the internet and playing video games. I'm a journalist for an up and coming gaming website, but that currently creates very little income, so I'm looking for a job on the side. When I get the chance, I spend a whole lot of time with people that I consider close to me doing anything from playing games and getting drunk to simply taking a walk outside for an hour or more. My love life has been a roller coaster, just like most people out there and I just came out of a ridiculous internet relationship that honestly just made me realize how much I've like someone else since the day I met her. Despite all of the cookie cutter "been there, done that" life stuff, there's a whole lot that goes on in this crazy life of mine and I almost always have something to say. That, my friends, is why I'm here; to let loose both my inner demon and the sensitive side that I don't show off as often in person. I need to let it all hang out and get everything off my chest. Consider this the official beginning of my new life. Who knows where this will take me?
Before I go to bed, let me set the stage. I recently had a stroke, which I was lucky enough to survive unharmed. During the stroke, I had my first serious anxiety attack, which was added to my ever-growing list of diagnosed problems. Directly following that six hour trip to the emergency room, I caught Pneumonia. Not only that, but my ex-girlfriend from that last internet relationship didn't make it any easier. She kept trying to keep in touch and it made things really difficult. Most people would be devastated and in need of serious psychological help, but I actually really feel alive for the first time in my life. After the week I've been through, I feel as though my fears and worries have been lifted. Why fear spiders? Why freak out if a room is dark? Why worry about how ugly people think you are? Why worry about rejection? The list goes on for miles. Things that bothered me previously just don't matter anymore. I'm lucky to be alive and I genuinely appreciate my life and all that it encompasses. Because of this, I decided to reach out and try to grab what I want: the girl I haven't really been able to get out of my head since I met her. When we first met, things went down the wrong way and the shit hit the fan for really stupid reasons. We both messed up and it caused problems. I said some things I didn't mean, but ultimately she became my number one. In my mind, there is currently no one else I'd rather be with. I don't know if it'll go anywhere and I'll certainly be content with her eternal friendship, but I would be the happiest man alive if she and I became a lasting couple. I was far too terrified to try anything real with her prior to this, but I was also under the influence of a mutual friend. You see, this mutual friend would constantly encourage me to make the wrong moves at the wrong time. It confused me and stirred up my emotions way too much and there wasn't much I could do about it. Every time I thought everything was okay, she would tell me to make the moves again. I never actually did what she said to do, but those words would always make me question the situation. I never knew what was really going on, so I just wound up doing backflips in my head trying to figure it all out. Now I know the truth, though. The girl I like never disliked me. She never hated me. She never had anything against me. The timing was just bad and there were complications that couldn't be avoided. It's all in the past now, though and I'm trying my best to make her happy. She doesn't even realize what she does to me. When she's close, my heart beats rapidly. When she smiles, I smile. When I think about her, I get butterflies. It's so crazy, but she has such a massive impact on me that I can't even completely explain. She's terrific and we share many similar interests. I'm not the best conversationalist, but she always understands me and she's completely okay with who I am. She's the only thing on my mind right now.
In summary, my life was screwed up for a long time, I had some serious problems, followed by a seemingly endless stream of even more problems, then I realized that life is grand. Since then, I've been trying my hardest to make the girl I like as happy as I can. The only thing I want right now is to hold her in my arms.
In a nutshell, that's my current situation. I'm wonderfully happy, but there's always something going on. There's plenty more to talk about, but why rush? Just like everyone else, I have a story and I want to tell it, but not entirely in one night. For now, I'm off to catch a few winks of sleep. Good night, fellow bloggers and readers alike!