Saturday, February 7, 2009

Tired, aggitated and left out...

First of all, I'm running on about 3 hours of sleep. Second, I got ditched tonight by everyone. Third, I spent a lot of time playing a few shitty games. Finally, I've realized that, regardless what apologies people throw around, no one is ever really sorry. They can apologize all they want, but at the end of the day, this has happened so many times that I've honestly lost track. I'm tired of being ditched, pushed aside, lied to and ignored. It was a simple trip to spend time with my supposed friends, but I was literally left out. They all ignored me all day and when I asked my other friend if she could just come get me when we leave, she just ignored me and didn't come. She said that her phone died. I don't believe that at all. She was at home and even if she wasn't, she always, always, always has her charger with her. She can't live without her phone and that's just how it is. She can't use that excuse when she's at home, either way. I'm sick and tired of this shit. This tops off the bad experiences I've been through with the girl I like. On that note, I'd like to give a shout out to my cousin, who will remain unnamed and probably wont even see this blog. Even though she's a woman of few words, she listens and genuinely cares. She shows me she cares in her own little ways. As an example, I'm the only person she allows to call her by her full name. She's really hurt people for doing so in the past, but never me. She doesn't mind it when I do it. Even the rest of the family get bitched at. I'm special to her and while she'll never say it, I know it's true. It's about the only positive thing I have to hold on to right now, despite all of the cool material objects I've obtained lately. Even my GTX 280 doesn't make me very happy right now because I still need a new power supply to really use it. Also, "The Simpsons Game" and "Project Gotham Racing 4" are both pretty cool games. I wouldn't say that they're at the top of their genres, but they have their strong points and I definitely see myself finishing them and maybe even getting as many achievements as is reasonably possible without busting my balls for 500 hours. "Mirror's Edge" is also terrific and the PC version is far superior to the console version for 2 reasons. 1) PhysX are fucking awesome. 2) The controls are very tight and much easier to work with on the PC; it's the first and only game that's ever felt better on PC for me because of the mouse. I aim better with a controller than most people do with a mouse, but in "Mirror's Edge", the mouse is simply a necessity for fluidity of control. Also, it invokes serious adrenaline rushes when I'm getting into it. I even start getting afraid of heights, which is a real-life fear of mine and in some ways, it almost makes me more comfortable with heights in real-life. It's just that realistic, although at times a little far-fetched. I love it. In closing, I'd just like to point out that today is a bad day and that I hope tomorrow is a far superior day. For now, I'm done. I just had to vent some more. I really can't believe how shitty everyone is being lately, ya' know? It's bullshit. Time to take my antibiotics and wind down. Take care.


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